If you took your last three failed relationships, your last three jobs that were toxic, and let's just throw in the last three moments of your burnout. And if you strip away the names, the places, and the details, what is the one thing that shows up every single situation? Because whatever your answer is, that is not by coincidence. That is you. And this is the part that is hard to sit with because you've changed things, you've switched environments, you've walked away from people, you've started over more than one time. And if we are being honest about the outcomes, they feel real familiar, don't they? Different situation, same pressure, different opportunity, same stress, different people, same ending. And at some point, you're probably telling yourself things like this why does this always happen to me? It doesn't always happen to you. It's not just happening, it's being produced, and that is where most people miss it. Because you think that you're playing life like it's a game of monopoly, you're moving pieces, you're making decisions, you're trying to land on something better. But what you don't realize is that you are playing the board with an identity that has already decided how this game is going to end. And honestly, I didn't always think like this. Back in high school, I went to a vocational school, okay? And at that time, I hated it. When I say I hated it, I hated it. All of my friends were in a regular high school, so it looked like they were having so much fun, they were doing all these things that I would consider as a normal experience, and I'm over here breaking down computers. Like, what? I'm rebuilding them, I'm installing software, I'm coding, and I felt like I was missing out. Like, this is a boring version of what life should be in high school. But what I did not realize back then was that I was learning how systems actually work. I remember people would bring their computers in, right? Frustrated, hot, just frantic. This won't open, this is missing, uh, this is moving too slow, please help me. And every single time it looked like it was a different problem, a different complaint, a different situation. But when I actually sat down and looked at everything, it was the same issue. The system was outdated, it wasn't updated, so it couldn't process properly, it couldn't communicate properly, and it didn't function the way that we expected it to function. And once you updated the system, half of the problems disappeared, and the rest became easier to fix. So now you're on something I call the merry-go-round effect. Same patterns, same cycles, same emotional walls. Only thing different is that the names attached to it are different. You leave one job, you find another one. You got the same burnout, you leave one relationship, you find another one. Some of y'all be finding these relationships too quick, but you still have the same frustration, different person. You hit one level of success, and somehow you end up right back at the same point, the same starting place, the same ceiling. And it is exhausting because it feels like you're moving, but you are not progressing, and this is where people get it twisted because you think that the solution out there is that you have a better opportunity, or that you will find better people, or maybe better timing. You think that if you just land on the right space on the board, everything is going to change. But here is where the glitch comes in. You are a high-functioning system running outdated code. I'm gonna let that sit with you for a second. Because it doesn't matter where you land, if your identity is programmed for struggle, you're gonna find a way to struggle in that position. If you just heard yourself in that, if you've recognized your pattern, the same burnout, the same ceiling, the same ending with different names attached to it, then you already know that the Merry Go Round isn't stopping on its own. You have to decide to get off. And that starts with understanding exactly what's keeping you on it. That is why I put together a breakdown that walks you through how to catch these patterns in real time. Identify what you're actually getting from staying stuck and shift how you show up without overthinking every step. Because here is the truth: you don't need a new opportunity, you need a new standard for who you are when opportunity shows up. The link is in the description. Go get it, and then go pick your three standards. Alright, let's get back to this. This is what I tell my clients. You don't have different problems, you have a repeating problem. That is the feeling that you get when you're like, oh, I've been here before. That feeling is not random, it's the same version of you, but it's showing up in a different situation. Now I remember hitting a point in my life where I was like, why does every opportunity start off strong? But get this. Then somehow I'm stressed out, I'm overwhelmed, and I'm doing everything by myself again. It's a different project, it's different people, but it's the same ending. And I had to sit with this uncomfortable truth. I had to say, okay, Juanita, what exactly is going on? What part of me is recreating this? And this isn't just a personal thing. This shows up everywhere that you lead. And this is the same reason that businesses plateau. Teams repeat the same mistakes, and leaders they feel like they've constantly put out all kinds of fires. This is why you can switch strategies, you can hire new people, you can even grow and still feel like you're managing the same problems in a different form. So, what I want you to do is go back to your last three situations that did not work. I don't want you to look at what happened. I want you to look at how you showed up in all three of those situations. And when you find that common denominator, you know that that is your pattern. And if you are a leader of a team or you run a business, you do the same exact thing with the last three breakdowns, but you're asking yourself, where did execution fall off? And how did leadership show up in each one of those situations? That common denominator is going to be your pattern. The second thing that I coach my clients on is your identity protects what feels familiar, even if it's hurting you. If struggle is what you know, right, peace is going to feel weird. And this is where it gets a little tricky because you finally get the opportunity that you asked for, but instead of stepping into that opportunity, you start hesitating, you start overthinking, you start double checking, waiting. And I've done this before. I got into a space that I prayed for, and instead of actually moving with confidence, I slowed myself down, trying to make sure everything was perfect, make sure everything was right. And it wasn't about being ready in that moment, it was about not being used to the level of responsibility that I was I had. So, what did I do in that moment? I shrunk. I shrunk right back into what felt normal. And if you're leading people, this plays out in your team too. Everything rises and fall on leadership. That's why some leaders sabotage momentum. Right when things start working, everything goes to crap. Because success requires a version of them that they haven't stabilized yet. Sit with that, and once you let that marinate a little bit, I want you to do something. This week, I want you to catch one moment that you're hesitating on. Think of that something that you already know that you should be doing and you have not done it. And once you figure that out, you need to just get moving, okay? No overthinking, no delay, no doubting, just move. And your work, that's going to look like making a decision that you've been delaying. If you need to send an email, have the conversation with the person, or just move the project forward without overprocessing it, do that. So the third thing is you are benefiting from the cycle more than what you think you are. And I know that a lot of people are probably not going to like this, but every cycle comes with a reward, even if it's costing you growth. Now, I've had a season where I stayed overloaded, doing everything, helping everybody, and it looked like I was booked and busy, because that's exactly what I would tell people. I'm like, yeah, I'm booked and busy. Uh-huh. But if I'm being quite honest with you, I actually like being that busy because it made me feel like I was needed, right? People depended on me, but I was tired. I wasn't changing it because slowing down for me, it meant that I had to face who I was without anybody needing me, without all of that movement, and that's what people they're not going to talk about. So scale that up, and it looks the same in business. That was my personal story. But this is where leaders stay over involved, businesses stay dependent, and growth is capped because letting go would force a new identity. So, what do I want you to do about this? You need to ask yourself this and be honest because listen, you lie to me, it makes no difference. What do I lose if I actually change? Ask yourself that. And whatever your answer is, that is going to be what's keeping you stuck. And if you're honest about that answer and you are in leadership, holding on too long usually looks like you're overworking. It looks like you're over controlling or you're not trusting your team. And that's what slows everything down. The fourth thing is goals don't break cycles. You know what does break the cycle? Standards. Goals, they sound good, they look good written down, but your standards, your standards are going to expose who you are. Because now it's not I'm trying to do this better. This is who I am, is what you're saying. And then what I had to do was I had to shift from saying that I need to be more consistent because I was really putting myself down, like, oh, I'm I'm not consistent with my stuff. But I had to shift that mindset to the point where I'm like, I do what I say I'm going to do. I am a finisher. I complete the things that I start even when I don't feel like it. And guess what that did? That showed up in small moments. It's like saying I was going to do something. And then that moment will hit me where I don't even feel like it anymore. And here's what that actually looked like in practice. The moment hit where I said that I was going to do something, right? Like I'm going to check this email at 8 a.m. And then when 8 a.m. comes around, I don't feel like checking the email. So the old me negotiated with it. And the new me did it anyway. And that's where your real identity shows up. That's the difference. Not in the plan, but it's in the follow-through. And in business, this is exactly why execution breaks down. Because goals are clear, but you don't have any standards that are enforced. So one thing that I want you to do is pick one standard. I want you to pick one standard. I want you to pick one standard, not five, not ten, one. I had to repeat that because sometimes what we do is we get into this uh mode where we start just rambling on all of these different things. And that's not what I asked for. I asked for one standard, and I want you to keep it for seven days straight. No excuses, no negotiation. And if you are a leader, you are leading others. Your standard sets the temperature for everybody that's around you. So you need to define one non-negotiable standard this week. Something that your team can feel and not just hear. Stand 10 toes down on it. And lastly, here is the truth that you're probably not going to like. So I'm giving you a full disclaimer up front. Don't be getting mad at me later and don't put none of that stuff in the comments, okay? Because I gave your warning. But this one here is important. You're not waiting on a better opportunity. You are avoiding becoming the person that can handle the one that you already have. And this is the one thing that hit me hard personally, because there were things that I said I wanted, but when it came time to actually move on them, I delayed it. I had to think about it. I needed to prepare more. I wasn't ready. It wasn't the right time. And if I am being real, it had nothing to do with timing. It was me knowing that once I step into this, I cannot go back and I can't play small. And that's what people avoid. Not the opportunity. They avoid the responsibility that comes with it. And the higher that you go, the more expensive the avoidance gets. And that is why opportunities sit. Nothing happens. Ideas don't get executed, and businesses they stall at that moment. Think about the one thing that you've been putting off. You already know what it is. I don't have to tell you. And if I had time, I will wait for you to answer it. But I don't have the time. So this is what I want you to do. Don't try to be perfect with it. Don't try to have it fully figured out. Just start it. Because the delay is already costing you, it's costing you momentum, it's costing you clarity, it's costing you money sometimes. And you know that. So here's what we are doing. Are you ready? No, I didn't hear you. You gotta say, I'm ready, Juanita. Okay, we're not thinking about this, we're not planning it. We are not saving it for another day when we are free. You're picking three standards. You're gonna pick a morning standard. That'll be let's just give it about 10 minutes. No phone, no noise. You just resetting. You're gonna have a boundary standard. And this boundary standard is going to be one no this week. Something that you can say no to that you actually mean and stand on it. And then the last standard is a growth standard. You're gonna take one action every day that moves your life forward forever and backwards never. And here is the key to all of this. You don't negotiate with it because the reason you're stuck right now is because you've been negotiating this whole time with the old version of yourself every single day. So as I leave you, what pattern keeps showing up in your life? What belief do you have about yourself that you're allowing to continue that you need to cut it? And what are you holding on to? What are you holding on to that's actually holding you back? And if nothing changed, where would the same cycle have you a year from now? Remember, you're not broken, you are running a version of yourself that doesn't match where you are going. And until you start updating your operating system, it's not going to matter how hard you work. You'll keep ending up in the same place, just tired. So you don't need to run faster, you don't need to find a better board, you don't need to have a new opportunity or find new people. You need a new standard for who you are when opportunity shows up.